Such a big ego

Let me break down what I mean by the use of the word ego. I am referring to the psychoanalysis definition of Ego: the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity.

The ego is what makes us human and differentiates us from all other living organisms. It is also the part of the mind that encourages us to forget about the other part of us. The part of us that is connected to all living organisms; our soul.

Our human minds are a constant system of on-going research for building a future as well as on-going questions about whether we are building the right future. We wonder if we are on the right path or living up to our full potential. The ego's job is literally to test and judge us at all times. It's job is to tell you that "failure is bad," "you don't matter," "you aren't worthy." When the ego's voice becomes so loud and it's all we choose to hear, this is when a soul in human form becomes unconscious and unaware. Destruction comes with an unconscious human. When I speak of the word unconscious -I do not mean physically asleep- I mean mentally asleep, unaware of the depth of our purpose or not in touch with a higher vibrational way of life. And when there are millions of unconscious human beings that have allowed their egos to take over- we see mass destruction. It's a timeless tale of the superhero versus the villain; the original superhero is our authentic souls and the villain is our relentless egos. So basically what I am telling you that I believe is that we have a two selves and it is our choice which self we spend more time feeding: the ego or the soul.

Ever since I was very little I've had countless thoughts rushing through my head at all times. I have been notorious for being in my own world, zoning out, not being present because I am listening to my own thoughts. When I was young I was told this was considered an anxious mind. I began to realize, (with the help of age, research, getting to know myself better, and most importantly guidance from important people in my life) that the constant thoughts were either analyzations of past experiences or visualizations of future ones; aka ego.

What started becoming interesting to me was those moments of quiet I'd experience far and few between the noise. The moments when my brain would be still, I would be completely content. Now I know those times happen when I am thinking, breathing, and living completely in the current moment. In the exact moment we are in right now; nothing can be wrong if nothing can be changed. Where we are, is where we are and there is quite frankly nothing we can do about it and if there is something we can do about it then we MUST DO IT or we are poisoning the current moment with complaints, negativity and anxiety. When I finally discovered the immense importance of the quiet times, I began to do research on how to make this happen every day of my life.

Although I've written in many past blog posts the things I do regularly that bring me peace, I can still say I have far to go. Humbly and aware, I have far to go. I am empowered by the access to knowledge at my finger tips and I get goosebumps thinking of all of the amazing things I have yet to learn. My success in life will come with each learned lesson.